Mani (Mainstream): Modi, did you replace your computer yet? Are you back on the Internet?
Modi (Moderate): No, I have not had the funds. I use the computer at work but only for business. What is up?
Mani: Radi has been raising cane the last few days about Holland again. His nephew says that the stores there created brand new lines of fashions for Muslim women. He has a page from one of the catalogs and will not let me see it. It is not only Holland that is having new fashions.
Modi: (laughs) That is just like Radi. Last year I saw a story on some obscure channel that mentioned such a phenomenon. Besides European countries now, it seems that a few others, including Somalia and Ethiopia, and even Darfur Muslim women have had very brilliant colors above and below for some time. When I saw some of the European and Middle East apparel, I thought they were gorgeous. They were using all colors of the rainbow—I could hardly believe my eyes when I actually saw a miniskirt in Campbell plaid. If Radi has something like that, he will go on for days.
Mani: That is what his neighbors are saying. He will not show them the page either.
Modi: That is a shame, Mani. Radi is such a decent sort otherwise; however, those nuts he pals around with outside the Mosque are not funny. It is strange how just a few people can drive the rest of us insane by their ignorance.
Mani: But Modi, Radi really is correct. Women are supposed to keep themselves fully covered and unobtrusive. You know about Ayat 24:30.
Modi: Mani, I am surprised at that. I know our Most Beloved would be also. In the Qur’an, only verses 24:31 and 33:59 refer to women dressing modestly. Verse 24:30 was addressed to men. Women wore long scarves in those days, so that 24:31 simply advises them to cover their chests with it (assuming they were wearing one). Both verses 30 and 31 said "guard your private parts," but 31 also added a warning for the women not to stamp their feet to make their “adornment” jingle. I guess some men are turned on by the sound of gold or silver. There is nothing in the Qur’an about hijabs or niqahs.
Mani: I know I read that verse repeatedly, but I never got that idea from it. Whenever you recite it, I do NOT get the idea that women are supposed to wear that ugly headgear.
Modi: The most radical of translations, has verse 33:59 only telling females that they should adjust part of their outer garments so that they can be recognized as women and not abused. It also reminds everyone that Allah is always forgiving and merciful. Now, what does that tell you?
Mani: I have not heard anything in your recitation that talked about abayas, chadors, hijabs, or black-only.
Modi: Mani, you said it all. Women have been cheated for years. They were forced into ultraconservative modesty rules that did not exist, except in the minds of some folks that could only think in black-and-white. They were cheated out of the fun of walking by a group of men and seeing their appreciative stares. They all thought modesty equated with antivanity.
Mani: And I feel sad at the thought that many women were severely punished and even killed because they were breaking rules that did not exist.
Modi: That by itself is a good reason for our looking at the verses again and making a more realistic determination of what Allah was saying to us. The fact that he reminded us that He is always forgiving and merciful should tell us that He knows we are human and like to show off on occasion.
Mani: I certainly wish I could get hold of that catalog page from our pal Radi.
Modi: I will try to get my newspaper office to consider an article about the new fashions. Come to think of it, if they agree to print an article like that, complete with photographs, it might brighten this place up a little.
Mani: Al-Qaeda will go nuts if women all of a sudden began to dress as they do in parts of Lebanon.
Modi: To hell with al-Qaeda! They were never our friends. They are only prudes who think they know the words of Allah, but they do not. They know only the words that others made up, spinning the meanings as they went along with some outrageous agenda.
Radi (Radical): I heard that. Who do you think you are, insulting our friends and heroes like that?
Modi: Hello, Radi. I thought you were still running around your neighborhood, poking holes in the air.
Radi: That was very funny. One of these nights, my friends and I will pay you a visit. You have been insulting Allah, Muhammad, the Qur’an, and the Hadiths.
Modi: Don’t forget the Dalai Lama. I must have insulted him somehow, since I seem to have insulted everyone else.
Radi: I have told you time and time again I was not going to put up with your air of so-called moderation. The Qur’an is sacred just as it is, and nobody better ever change one letter of it. It is Allah’s gift to us.
Modi: You do not even know the Qur’an, Radi. I have heard you recite it two or three times. It is obvious you have no idea what you are saying.
Radi: (Bares his knife.) I will have your head for that.
Mani: Modi, why don’t you apologize or something?
Modi: I should apologize to Radi? Why should I? People like Radi are the source of many of our troubles. He thinks he knows everything, and he knows nothing. He is too busy defending nonsense instead of taking the time to really read and discuss the things he should know.
Mani: But Radi studied the Qur’an just as you did, Modi.
Modi: Not quite. There is a difference between studying to know the way Allah wanted things and researching to find little tidbits, which when taken out of context can be used as a weapon against our people. Why is he so dead set against the new colorful dresses, chic jackets, and great-looking shoes? Because he is an ignorant prude who sees evil everywhere he looks. Radi, it is time for you to grow up. I am sure your fiancée will look great in some of those new dresses.
Radi: What?
Modi: You saw the photos from the catalog. That one dress, the black one with the gold trim and the style of the Cossack; can’t you just see Zaina with that dress and the red jacket and the gold buttons. The dress came just above the knee and the black leather boots really set the whole package off.
Mani: Oh, yes, Radi. I bet Zaina would be a knockout in that outfit. (Radi, still holding his knife, is in deep thought.)
Modi: Can’t you just see her with just a little Egyptian eyeliner and a hint of lip rouge? Why, she would be the most beautiful vision in all of Baghdad. (Radi continues to stare into space)
Mani: (Cautiously backs up, away from Radi) Yes, Yes. That black dress and red jacket would set off her dark eyes. What a wonderful vision she would be, arm and arm with you. (He hurriedly walks away, unnoticed by Radi.)
Modi: (walks quietly away while he speaks) I just cannot think of a lovelier vision than Zaina with large, golden earrings set off by her jet-black hair. Oh, what a picture she makes.
Radi: Hey, do you guys think I should buy…. Where are you? (Modi and Mani are nowhere in sight. Passers-by wonder to whom he is speaking. He shakes his fist.) I am going to get you sons of snakes!
HJS
Modi (Moderate): No, I have not had the funds. I use the computer at work but only for business. What is up?
Mani: Radi has been raising cane the last few days about Holland again. His nephew says that the stores there created brand new lines of fashions for Muslim women. He has a page from one of the catalogs and will not let me see it. It is not only Holland that is having new fashions.
Modi: (laughs) That is just like Radi. Last year I saw a story on some obscure channel that mentioned such a phenomenon. Besides European countries now, it seems that a few others, including Somalia and Ethiopia, and even Darfur Muslim women have had very brilliant colors above and below for some time. When I saw some of the European and Middle East apparel, I thought they were gorgeous. They were using all colors of the rainbow—I could hardly believe my eyes when I actually saw a miniskirt in Campbell plaid. If Radi has something like that, he will go on for days.
Mani: That is what his neighbors are saying. He will not show them the page either.
Modi: That is a shame, Mani. Radi is such a decent sort otherwise; however, those nuts he pals around with outside the Mosque are not funny. It is strange how just a few people can drive the rest of us insane by their ignorance.
Mani: But Modi, Radi really is correct. Women are supposed to keep themselves fully covered and unobtrusive. You know about Ayat 24:30.
Modi: Mani, I am surprised at that. I know our Most Beloved would be also. In the Qur’an, only verses 24:31 and 33:59 refer to women dressing modestly. Verse 24:30 was addressed to men. Women wore long scarves in those days, so that 24:31 simply advises them to cover their chests with it (assuming they were wearing one). Both verses 30 and 31 said "guard your private parts," but 31 also added a warning for the women not to stamp their feet to make their “adornment” jingle. I guess some men are turned on by the sound of gold or silver. There is nothing in the Qur’an about hijabs or niqahs.
Mani: I know I read that verse repeatedly, but I never got that idea from it. Whenever you recite it, I do NOT get the idea that women are supposed to wear that ugly headgear.
Modi: The most radical of translations, has verse 33:59 only telling females that they should adjust part of their outer garments so that they can be recognized as women and not abused. It also reminds everyone that Allah is always forgiving and merciful. Now, what does that tell you?
Mani: I have not heard anything in your recitation that talked about abayas, chadors, hijabs, or black-only.
Modi: Mani, you said it all. Women have been cheated for years. They were forced into ultraconservative modesty rules that did not exist, except in the minds of some folks that could only think in black-and-white. They were cheated out of the fun of walking by a group of men and seeing their appreciative stares. They all thought modesty equated with antivanity.
Mani: And I feel sad at the thought that many women were severely punished and even killed because they were breaking rules that did not exist.
Modi: That by itself is a good reason for our looking at the verses again and making a more realistic determination of what Allah was saying to us. The fact that he reminded us that He is always forgiving and merciful should tell us that He knows we are human and like to show off on occasion.
Mani: I certainly wish I could get hold of that catalog page from our pal Radi.
Modi: I will try to get my newspaper office to consider an article about the new fashions. Come to think of it, if they agree to print an article like that, complete with photographs, it might brighten this place up a little.
Mani: Al-Qaeda will go nuts if women all of a sudden began to dress as they do in parts of Lebanon.
Modi: To hell with al-Qaeda! They were never our friends. They are only prudes who think they know the words of Allah, but they do not. They know only the words that others made up, spinning the meanings as they went along with some outrageous agenda.
Radi (Radical): I heard that. Who do you think you are, insulting our friends and heroes like that?
Modi: Hello, Radi. I thought you were still running around your neighborhood, poking holes in the air.
Radi: That was very funny. One of these nights, my friends and I will pay you a visit. You have been insulting Allah, Muhammad, the Qur’an, and the Hadiths.
Modi: Don’t forget the Dalai Lama. I must have insulted him somehow, since I seem to have insulted everyone else.
Radi: I have told you time and time again I was not going to put up with your air of so-called moderation. The Qur’an is sacred just as it is, and nobody better ever change one letter of it. It is Allah’s gift to us.
Modi: You do not even know the Qur’an, Radi. I have heard you recite it two or three times. It is obvious you have no idea what you are saying.
Radi: (Bares his knife.) I will have your head for that.
Mani: Modi, why don’t you apologize or something?
Modi: I should apologize to Radi? Why should I? People like Radi are the source of many of our troubles. He thinks he knows everything, and he knows nothing. He is too busy defending nonsense instead of taking the time to really read and discuss the things he should know.
Mani: But Radi studied the Qur’an just as you did, Modi.
Modi: Not quite. There is a difference between studying to know the way Allah wanted things and researching to find little tidbits, which when taken out of context can be used as a weapon against our people. Why is he so dead set against the new colorful dresses, chic jackets, and great-looking shoes? Because he is an ignorant prude who sees evil everywhere he looks. Radi, it is time for you to grow up. I am sure your fiancée will look great in some of those new dresses.
Radi: What?
Modi: You saw the photos from the catalog. That one dress, the black one with the gold trim and the style of the Cossack; can’t you just see Zaina with that dress and the red jacket and the gold buttons. The dress came just above the knee and the black leather boots really set the whole package off.
Mani: Oh, yes, Radi. I bet Zaina would be a knockout in that outfit. (Radi, still holding his knife, is in deep thought.)
Modi: Can’t you just see her with just a little Egyptian eyeliner and a hint of lip rouge? Why, she would be the most beautiful vision in all of Baghdad. (Radi continues to stare into space)
Mani: (Cautiously backs up, away from Radi) Yes, Yes. That black dress and red jacket would set off her dark eyes. What a wonderful vision she would be, arm and arm with you. (He hurriedly walks away, unnoticed by Radi.)
Modi: (walks quietly away while he speaks) I just cannot think of a lovelier vision than Zaina with large, golden earrings set off by her jet-black hair. Oh, what a picture she makes.
Radi: Hey, do you guys think I should buy…. Where are you? (Modi and Mani are nowhere in sight. Passers-by wonder to whom he is speaking. He shakes his fist.) I am going to get you sons of snakes!
HJS
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