Modi (Moderate):
I guess you guys heard that the new Sheik in town, Gordon Brown, thinks we are not an army, just criminals. He is going to send in his peelers to arrest us.
Mani (Mainstream):
Yeah; that’s funny. I thought Tony B was dumb; but this guy…
Radi (Radical):
What’s a peeler?
Modi:
Well, you know that Kerry, Kennedy and others had the same idea, as does that Leftist party in American—I forgot the name.
Mani:
You mean the one that calls us “The Religion of Peace”?
Radi:
C’mon, guys; what’s a peeler?
Modi:
No, that’s the other party. I’m talking about the party that thinks we were deprived of a good education and social programs…and that is the reason why you guys are attacking them all over the world.
Mani:
Ah, those. Democrats, they are called. I get my kicks watching Dr. Zawahiri making fools out of them. The good doctor tells them things, they don’t know what he means. And they have no way of finding out. What a bunch of dolts—almost as dumb as the president. Religion of peace; that is a hot one.
Radi:
Now look, I want to know what a peeler is, and I want to know now.
Modi:
Radi, it is Brit slang for policeman; like bobby or cop. Mani, all these Yanks have to do is look at the three basic literary masterpieces of Islam to find the answer to all their questions. But they are either too dumb or too ignorant to look.
Mani:
I never really thought of them together, but you are right. The Qur’an, the Sura, and the Ahadith. But I would bet, if we were allowed to bet, that they would spend more time with the Qur’an than the other two documents. Even Radi knows better than that.
Radi:
I know better than what?
Modi:
What we were discussing is the Americans and Europeans seem to think that the Qur’an is the totality of our religion and our culture. They do not realize that all through the Qur’an we are commanded to obey Allah and His messenger. It is written that we must emulate the Prophet of Allah in all things, he led the perfect life. That is why we had been called Muhammedans for so long.
Mani:
Righto! Everyone thought we worshipped Muhammad. I can understand how they got that impression—we really dote on his life. One would think that the West would have caught on to that by now. It’s not the Qur’an they should be researching—if they are researching anything. I have my doubts—but the biography of Muhammad (the Sura) and the Ahadith, what Muhammad has said about everything.
Radi:
I have been trying to collect the Hadith sayings, but I don’t know how many there are.
Modi:
Just with the four most popular Ahadith (Sahih) writers: Bukhari, Muslim, Malik, and a partial collection of Dawud, there about 7,300. Of course, many of them are repeated and told in a different way by a different witness.
Mani:
My father was a good business man and he used to read me one Hadith from Dawud many times. I think it was Number 170 and it told of how the spoils of the raid on Khaybar were divided afterwards. First they were divided in half and one-half went to the people with the Prophet—including the Prophet himself. The rest went to Allah and His Messenger for future needs. If we are still doing this, I am missing out on something. Radi, what do you know about this?
Radi:
There is always profit in war. In some places, we can walk away with lots of cash for what we do. Sure, there are many dumb ones who are hot-to-trot to get themselves killed, but once they get over the nonsense and realize the more hell they raise, the more money they can make, then they go ape for a few raids, go home with their pockets filled, and let some of the others take their turn. A really good, horror story brings lots of cash from Europe and America.
Modi:
I suspect one chap was worth millions before the Americans caught up to him.
Mani:
But he is okay now. He is in martyr’s Paradise.
Radi:
After what Modi said a couple of weeks ago, I am not too sure about that. Modi said it is in the law that you must be totally committed to the love of Allah and have no other reason to engage in jihad; otherwise, your sacrifice is for naught.
Mani:
I remember that. Fighting for territory, politics, spoils, honor, money, or even just for comradeship is not jihad. And purposely sacrificing one’s life for any or all of these petty reasons, and not simply for love of Allah will get us an early hell. I checked, Radi, it is in the law. I would have bet that it wasn't. Maybe that's why I am not a betting man.
Modi:
Told ya!
HJS
I guess you guys heard that the new Sheik in town, Gordon Brown, thinks we are not an army, just criminals. He is going to send in his peelers to arrest us.
Mani (Mainstream):
Yeah; that’s funny. I thought Tony B was dumb; but this guy…
Radi (Radical):
What’s a peeler?
Modi:
Well, you know that Kerry, Kennedy and others had the same idea, as does that Leftist party in American—I forgot the name.
Mani:
You mean the one that calls us “The Religion of Peace”?
Radi:
C’mon, guys; what’s a peeler?
Modi:
No, that’s the other party. I’m talking about the party that thinks we were deprived of a good education and social programs…and that is the reason why you guys are attacking them all over the world.
Mani:
Ah, those. Democrats, they are called. I get my kicks watching Dr. Zawahiri making fools out of them. The good doctor tells them things, they don’t know what he means. And they have no way of finding out. What a bunch of dolts—almost as dumb as the president. Religion of peace; that is a hot one.
Radi:
Now look, I want to know what a peeler is, and I want to know now.
Modi:
Radi, it is Brit slang for policeman; like bobby or cop. Mani, all these Yanks have to do is look at the three basic literary masterpieces of Islam to find the answer to all their questions. But they are either too dumb or too ignorant to look.
Mani:
I never really thought of them together, but you are right. The Qur’an, the Sura, and the Ahadith. But I would bet, if we were allowed to bet, that they would spend more time with the Qur’an than the other two documents. Even Radi knows better than that.
Radi:
I know better than what?
Modi:
What we were discussing is the Americans and Europeans seem to think that the Qur’an is the totality of our religion and our culture. They do not realize that all through the Qur’an we are commanded to obey Allah and His messenger. It is written that we must emulate the Prophet of Allah in all things, he led the perfect life. That is why we had been called Muhammedans for so long.
Mani:
Righto! Everyone thought we worshipped Muhammad. I can understand how they got that impression—we really dote on his life. One would think that the West would have caught on to that by now. It’s not the Qur’an they should be researching—if they are researching anything. I have my doubts—but the biography of Muhammad (the Sura) and the Ahadith, what Muhammad has said about everything.
Radi:
I have been trying to collect the Hadith sayings, but I don’t know how many there are.
Modi:
Just with the four most popular Ahadith (Sahih) writers: Bukhari, Muslim, Malik, and a partial collection of Dawud, there about 7,300. Of course, many of them are repeated and told in a different way by a different witness.
Mani:
My father was a good business man and he used to read me one Hadith from Dawud many times. I think it was Number 170 and it told of how the spoils of the raid on Khaybar were divided afterwards. First they were divided in half and one-half went to the people with the Prophet—including the Prophet himself. The rest went to Allah and His Messenger for future needs. If we are still doing this, I am missing out on something. Radi, what do you know about this?
Radi:
There is always profit in war. In some places, we can walk away with lots of cash for what we do. Sure, there are many dumb ones who are hot-to-trot to get themselves killed, but once they get over the nonsense and realize the more hell they raise, the more money they can make, then they go ape for a few raids, go home with their pockets filled, and let some of the others take their turn. A really good, horror story brings lots of cash from Europe and America.
Modi:
I suspect one chap was worth millions before the Americans caught up to him.
Mani:
But he is okay now. He is in martyr’s Paradise.
Radi:
After what Modi said a couple of weeks ago, I am not too sure about that. Modi said it is in the law that you must be totally committed to the love of Allah and have no other reason to engage in jihad; otherwise, your sacrifice is for naught.
Mani:
I remember that. Fighting for territory, politics, spoils, honor, money, or even just for comradeship is not jihad. And purposely sacrificing one’s life for any or all of these petty reasons, and not simply for love of Allah will get us an early hell. I checked, Radi, it is in the law. I would have bet that it wasn't. Maybe that's why I am not a betting man.
Modi:
Told ya!
HJS
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